This morning as I was walking home,
I saw a star .
Well I saw several stars . In fact I saw many many stars which for Tokyo is unusual. It may be because the air was so cold and clear and the streets I was walking down were small and dark , anyway I looked up and there they were holding court in the indigo sky.
One in particular was just hanging there , fixed in place, shining and showing off .
I thought about that star .
Were there planets around it ?
Though possibly not, because wouldn’t we know that ?
Anyway it just kept up its twinkle and benevolent shine and I realized that life around that sun wouldn’t be like life here and whatever life was around that sun, wouldn’t give a rats arse about what we think people should be doing or wearing or how much money we do or don’t have .
Whatever life was up there wouldn’t give a fuck about what time I went to bed or woke up,
wouldn’t care what I was or wasn’t doing with my life or how much time I spent on Netflix.
And even if there was no life there at all, that sun , that beautiful gleaming shining star millions of miles away held no judgement over the life I was living .
There was no schedule or to do lists.
For that star there was nothing but energy and beauty .
I looked at it and it looked back .
Somehow over millions of miles ( and a lot of booze ) I felt a connection I can’t explain .
I’ve star gazed all my life but in the hour just after midnight on January the 11th 2018, I felt the energy of something beautiful .
I wish I could hold that feeling forever , but it’s gone with the light of day and a pounding hangover, and the sense that I’m getting nowhere is back in full force.